KINE 198 Chapter 7

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Relationships in General

  • Positive self-worth (How do you look at yourself)
  • Compromise
  • Trust
  • Open Communication (Actions speak louder than words"

On the note of communication...


Arguing Effectively

  1. Stay with the initial issue
  2. Stay in the present
  3. Say what you feel
  4. Do not generalize
  5. Do not threaten
  6. No violence
  7. State needs as specific requests
  8. Work toward a solution


Dating

  • Will bumps in the road break the relationship?
  • Dealing with arguments
  • Jealousy
    • normally caused by a lack of self-esteem
    • YOU? Look in your past and identify what happened
    • OTHER? Reassure him or her that there is no reason for jealousy

Social Networking has thrown many wrenches in the system. Facebook doesn't control your life!


Love

  • Intimacy
  • Passion
  • Commitment
Consummate Love
all three parts
Liking
Intimacy only
Infatuated Love
Passion only
Empty Love
Commitment only
Companionate Love
Passion and Commitment
Romantic Love
Intimacy and Passion
Fatuous Love
Commitment and Passion


Breaking Up

Sender
Be tactful, open, and honest
Don't ignore the other person
Receiver
Listen and don't respond with desperation
Remember feelings are very different and personal with each individual


Marriage

10 Characteristics of a happy marriage

  1. Giving
  2. Strong sense of commitment
  3. Not lost in relationship
  4. Consummate sex
  5. Talking (communication)
  6. Positive outlook
  7. Appreciation/praise for other
  8. Shared spiritual/religious morals
  9. Recognize needs of other
  10. Willing to grow, change, and work hard at their marriage


Unhealthy Relationships =

Warning Flags:

  • Insecurity (does the other person make you feel bad)
  • Low self-esteem
  • Dishonesty on either part
  • More hurtful feelings than good feelings
  • Complaining to others
  • Unable to talk or resolve differences

Aftermath becomes a mental-health risk:

  • Afraid of your partner
  • Comings and goings are monitored
  • Partner controls who you can talk to
  • Sex forced against will
  • Told what to wear
  • Abused for looking at another person
  • Threatened to harm anyone or anything close to you

Cycle of abusive relationships:

  1. Honeymoon phase - Apologies, flowers, unicorns, butterflies, and rainbows: "it's all better now"
  2. Tension building
  3. Explosion - Violent act